THE GLOVES ARE OFF! MEGHAN MARKLE VS KATE MIDDLETON

By Falak Amaar Khan
December 5, 2018
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Markle vs Middleton: Are You Team Meghan or Team Kate?

Pssst –  in a “rare” instance, Kensington Palace has issued a response to one of the latest reports by The Sun, which claimed that the women had an “explosive row” before Meghan Markle wed Prince Harry in May. We therefore proceed to give you, a timeline of events tracking our very own, Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki. Star performances by Meghan and Kate with a special appearance from the queen herself!

Have you heard? What is all the fuss about this Dewaraani/Jithani feud? It’s nothing new, is it? Well maybe it is, when it’s between the daughters in law at Buckingham Palace! You haven’t heard about it? All claims have been made by the Sun newspaper, so take it with a pinch of salt!

Here is a series of ‘not so royal’ events that took place between Markle and Middleton. We’ll keep it real for you by going desi on this one, so all the bahus, dewaraanis and jithaanis … and saasu maas can totally relate to the hungama!

1. Shaadi Na Karna Yaaron –  Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki Begins with the Royals!

‘Explosive Row’ before the wedding in May – Kate allegedly told Meghan not to berate her staff. Go Kate!

As the paper alleged, Kate told her soon-to-be sister-in-law not to berate members of her team, saying: “That’s unacceptable, they’re my staff and I speak to them.” The Palace claims: “That never happened.”

So imagine your dewarani -to-be starts telling your maasi to use Dettol to scrub the floors and your khansama to add a bit more haldi  in the khaana. Would you like it? Now we’re not saying that’s exactly what Meghan did but whatever she did, or said, rubbed nice old Kate the wrong way.

Or was it that Kate misunderstood what Meghan was saying to the staff and bechari Meghan got told off before she even became part of the family officially. We’re not sure of the details here, so we’ll let this one hang in the air for you!

Starting off on the wrong foot or what?

2. Mein Ron Ya Hunsoon, Karoon Mein Kya Karoon? –  Bridezilla Strikes

Bridezilla  Meghan made Kate cry after a bridesmaid fitting for Charlotte

Now imagine both scenarios depending on whose side you’re on and the shaadi ka shub din is nearing.

The fittings for the royals are in order and of course, although they don’t have to run about for last minute adjustments, crying in front of the designer/kaam waala/ darzi to fix them can be a handful, especially when you’re barely over the post natal blues!. But what can you do when the “to be dulhan” decides to be difficult.

“Apparently”, Meghan decided to play Bridezilla and made Kate (who had just had her newborn) CRY over her strict demands for Princess Charlotte’s bridesmaid’s dress. Seriously Meghan?! We don’t even notice what the bacha party is wearing at Shaadis as after the first 10 minutes, they all look the same. Someone should have shown her pics of our kids at desi weddings. Maybe she would have laid off poor Charlotte … and Kate!

3. Yeh Ladki Hai Allah Kaisi Hai Dewaani … Kitna Mushkil Hai Tauba Iss Ko Samjhana 

Tiara tantrums! Apparently even HRH had to get involved to diffuse the situation – Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi

Accha mat pehno! Is what someone should have said to Meghan if this tamasha over the tiara is true!

The Queen (Daadi Amma) warned Prince Harry over Meghan Markle’s behaviour and attitude before their wedding following a row over the bride’s tiara. She said, ‘Meghan cannot have whatever she wants. She wears the tiara she’s given by me’. The extraordinary intervention from the monarch came after tense negotiations over what Meghan could wear.

Meghan wanted to wear a tiara that featured emeralds, according to royal sources. But the future Duke and Duchess of Sussex were not happy when they were told that the origins of that tiara are unknown. Meghan eventually wore a diamond and platinum headpiece which was chosen by the Queen.

Ab itna mehnga tiara mil raha hai tau khushi khushi pehen lo? Tauba itnay nakhray. Aur abhi to princess bane bi nahi thee!

4. Hum nay Ghar Chhorra Hai, Sapno Ko Tora Hai, Door Kahin Jaen Ge, Nai Dunya Basaen Ge!

Go Meghan and Harry, the world is your oyster … or Frogmore Cottage is more like it!

Moving out of Kensington palace because of the tension … or more likely because they need more space for their new arrival!

So news has it, or maybe rumour has it that Harry and Meghan have opted for a downgrade to the rundown Frogmore Cottage, one hour away from London on the grounds of Windsor Castle. And the brothers are now preparing to divide their household staff in anticipation of the move.

“Until recently, they were moving into Kensington Palace next door to Kate and William, so the change of plan has come as a shock,” says a palace insider. Daal main bohot kuch kaala hai!

And apparently the nokar/chaakars are praying that they don’t have to leave Kate and William as Harry and Meghan have developed a reputation of being demanding, temperamental – and, at times, rude.”

Meghan has been blamed for three staffers leaving Kensington Palace in six months, and that she thinks nothing of texting aides at 5am.

Hai Bahu rani! Apnay he pairon pay kulhari?

If any of this is true, and if there ever was a row, can you guess which team I’m on!

But not to fret people … they’ll still be joining the Queen for turkey on Xmas day!!

Kahani abhi baqi hai meray dost!

Check out the latest on the Celeb Weddings here and plan your own on Social Media!

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About Falak Amaar Khan

Falak Amaar Khan is a member of Team FUCHSIA, heading the Fashion section in her capacity as a fashion designer, stylist and choreographer. As a writer, Falak covers fashion, community and entertainment. This super busy mother of two is working towards supporting a cause through her work. She would also love to integrate more into the Singaporean community, and explore the island in a more realistic manner. Her motto in life? GET ON WITH IT!