So here’s the thing. The discovery of an extra-marital affair by your significant other (usually it’s the man who indulges, and the wife who unravels the mess, not me, but the stats do the talking) have a strange way of making men into Olympic level apologizers. They become so good at it that everyone who knows the ‘loving’ couple since the day they were married, or even before that (as our dear friend Hafiz knew Tabish and Beena), lean towards forgiveness. One more chance, they say to her, he’s truly repenting!
Aap Ki Izzat – the end met with divided fan reaction. But mostly Pakistani drama fans, especially women, felt satisfied with the feel-good, ‘happily ever after’ visual of Beena and Tabish hugging at the bottom of the staircase, and surprise, surprise, the audience finally forgave Tabish because the redemption track was so well placed, so genuine, and so, need I say, perfect. There was just the right hint of romance, lots of regret, a house deed to be handed over to the wife who was wronged, a potential move to Dubai, as well as an open offer that Beena can remarry if she wants to, when she wants to.
Show me a woman who would not say “Qabool Hai”. The audience said it.
Perhaps even those who might have suffered a similar fate as Beena? Because in Beena’s children, they see a family about to be torn apart, in Beena, they see a woman who tried to avenge her husband’s betrayal but ended up erring herself, in Tabish’s mother, they see true repentance, and apology. And now it was upto Beena to be the bigger person, to save the marriage, to willingly choose and give Tabish, and her life with him, a second chance. So what’s new about Beena, I ask. Thousands of women have done just that. And thousands more are being conditioned to do just that in future -and is Aap Ki Izzat helping seal the deal?
The Beena who forgave Tabish was the same Beena who had decided earlier to elope with a sabzi wala in order to exact revenge from Tabish, the same Beena who had tried to kill herself a while back because she could not contemplate a life with her husband anymore. It was not just a betrayal in their relationship that she mourned, but how Tabish had subjected her to constant negativity, derogatory remarks and dismissive behaviour over a span of many years. However, the Tabish before Beena now had learnt his lesson, perhaps from the same sabzi wala, who by the way, never repented. Y’all remember how Behram flipped the moment he was freed from prison? That is a slice of real life for you. Not Tabish, the repentant soul – gentle reminder.
Tabish was a born again husband though. Like I said, the perfect version that any wife would say “Qabool Hai” to, all over again.
But as the audience forgave Tabish and his past misdemeanours, his extra-marital affair and his devotion to his mother even when she guided him wrongly about Beena, in fact, especially when she guided him wrongly about Beena, there is one thing the audience did not forget, and forgive – Beena’s decision to run away with a sabzi wala. How could she be so irresponsible, reckless and yes, perhaps morally at fault, said the audience. Regardless of what Tabish had done, Beena should not have run away with a man.
And therein lies the problem folks.
While some women may forgive their man for cheating on them, they will never forgive a woman swaying from virtue, allowing her character to be tainted – the character they have spent so long protecting – her izzat – wasn’t that the name of the drama? The izzat that was earned in so many years, now diminished, dissolved, dismembered in just a few moments. As long as Pakistani dramas are being watched by a majority of women, the Beena’s in our lives will have a hard time seeking forgiveness. Because while it is in Beena’s suffering that the audience sees themselves, it is also her character that mirrors them. They cannot see themselves running off with another man, so to say, to cut off their nose and spite their face. But they can forgive a man for doing more or less the same… because, tragically, (and ironically), they expect no more from a man, that he might do it is a given, but a woman? Not a chance.
So what would have helped evoke audience sympathy for Beena? Does she in fact, need to take a page out of Tabish’s diary? It is more than evident now (check the comments section of the last episode) that when men apologize like Tabish, they are forgiven. And when women behave like Beena, they are damned and judged, for a lighter word, and… never forgiven.
Unless, and here’s what Beena could do better (and teach her sisters on the other side of the screen) – apologize like Tabish. Or at least, all the men in the world who get their second, third and fourth chances.
Skip to final lesson in Aap Ki Izzat: Be smart, be Tabish. Apologize like you mean it and the woman will forgive you, just like Beena and along with her, all the women who watched Aap Ki Izzat.
And Beena, a word for you. If you plan to run away with a man, take a page out of Tabish’s book and learn to apologize like him. You just might be forgiven, but don’t take that as a given. It’s a man’s world yet, and we’re just living in it.
Mitti De Baway Delivers the Hype. And That’s a Good Thing!
Aap Ki Izzat is directed by the acclaimed Saife Hassan, penned by Umera Ahmed, while renowned producers Momina Duraid and Nina Kashif have joined forces to bring this ambitious serial to the screen. The lead cast features Urwa Hocane, Ahsan Khan, Saif Ali Khan and Sania Saeed.
Follow us On Instagram
