Faraz in Wabaal – The Desi Husband Who’s Not Very Desi and audiences can’t be happy either way. Are you one of them?
Faraz in Wabaal is defying social norms, stepping away from the archetype that is desi, toxic, or even just, plain, man – if you know what I mean. To sum it up, Faraz in Wabaal is not going down well with our desi man expectations!
In a nutshell, I’ll keep it short, don’t worry, Faraz is challenging our desi conditioning. On the one hand, we fight for reform, liberated women, men who do not fly into a rage, who keep things cool, who let their wives work, not slave in the kitchen, who cook breakfast for their beloved desi wife, make up when she’s angry…in short, try to make a relationship last even when she’s the difficult one, the one who’s pushing the wrong buttons, complaining about his mother and wants all the luxuries of the world – in shorter version – that’s our man Faraz in a nutshell!
Are We The Problem?
Are we responsible for stereotyping men and making them fit into a mould that we’ve been conditioned to seeing? No matter how much or how often we scream women’s rights, is it really more about learning to accept the refreshing changes within our society. The ones we keep judging because we want a man to take charge, do more, be firm and … oh well… time to look in the mirror?
So, to sum it up, do we prevent men from redefining themselves? Do we judge them? Are we our own worst enemies?
I know men have been laughed at, even ridiculed often when they listen to their wives, give in or let her take the lead!
Does Faraz in Wabaal need to be more of a man? You’d be surprised at the answers I’m getting! Listen in or read up & tell me where you lean!
And now that we have Faraz, are we not happy with him?
Now here’s the catch with this character. Ever heard of men being ridiculed because they listen to their wives, they keep silent, allow themselves to be (ahem), dominated, are happy keeping the peace in a marriage and to whom, the happiness of their wife, the peace in the house, and letting her get her way is priority number one?
Our society has a few of those men, and many more who ridicule them. So, when the writer decides to throw us a curved ball, this googly in Faraz – the man who is transitioning between raising his hand at Anam and pacifying her minutes later to take her out on a drive in their new car, we shout murder!
Is he really that spineless? Does he not know how to be firm with his wife? Why did he take that car loan? Why is he allowing her to talk to his mom like that (in all fairness, Anam was quite rude, but his mom was equally interfering, say what?) and the final, unspoken dialogue – why can’t he be more of a man??? Oops!
But here’s the million-dollar question…
Are we a society who can’t be happy with or without?
We want the man to play sweet, be a partner rather than a master, balance his mom and wife, let her be the queen of the house, let her work, in short … let her BE! But once we do meet a hero like our dear, ‘enamoured by Anam Faraz’, we cry foul! We judge, we expect him to be firm, exacting, we expect him to take a stand… for what? His rights as a husband/ Or his rights as we see them as a man in our society?
As one astute viewer pointed out, how many men have left their ailing wives at home to attend a business dinner? Why are we feeling so bad for Faraz? How many women want to work in order to better their lifestyle, why are we judging Anam? And, to put it straight, why can’t Anam be treated like an adult, why does she need to be corrected, or set straight, does she not have a journey in which she will learn to balance life … also, we hope?
Interesting to note that if Anam’s character let loose a bit, showed slight empathy for Faraz’s financial pressures, we might identify with her a tad bit more.
Even more interesting to note is that she does have the ability to melt, makeup with Faraz (and even his mom), be happy, but unfortunately, only when things go her way.
To cut a long story short, many men have been where Anam is, and many women have been in Faraz’s situation. The problem is that the reversed roles are hard to digest by avid drama watchers who are conditioned to watching a take charge, alpha male take over the woman’s life. And even as we complain that we don’t want to see more Ashar’s (ref drama Humsafar) in our midst, is that what we really desire deep down? What does ‘being a man’ really mean, and are we confused, or just plain judgemental about the roles of men and women when we see a version we speak of, but not really ready to accept?
Ask a ‘Real’ Man, he might have the answers, because many viewers obviously don’t!
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