Every generation has that one coming-of-age movie that somehow becomes the coming-of-age movie for them, and for our generation, it was To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. It defined an era of teen rom-coms, gave us a whole new level of comfort watching, and, if we’re being honest, was probably rewatched far more than any of us would like to admit. I have personally watched it enough times that I physically cannot remember the precise number anymore. And yet, if it came on tomorrow, I would probably watch it again from the beginning. No questions asked.
There was just something about To All The Boys. Maybe it was Lara Jean’s little world, maybe it was Peter Kavinsky, maybe it was the fake dating trope we will apparently never outgrow, or maybe it was the soundtrack that made every scene feel ten times more romantic. Eight years later, we’ve grown up, watched new romances come and go, and seen the same tropes recycled in a hundred different ways. But somehow, this one still has us in a chokehold. Here’s why we’re still not over it.
1. The letters that started it all
The whole chaos began with Lara Jean’s love letters. Not texts. Not DMs. Not a Notes app confession she would immediately delete. Actual handwritten letters that she wrote to the boys she had loved and tucked away, never expecting them to see the light of day.
And honestly, there was something so romantic about that. Lara Jean wasn’t writing them to get a response; she was writing because she needed somewhere to put all those feelings. The letters were her private little world, until suddenly they weren’t private anymore. And just like that, we had the perfect recipe for teenage panic, romance and absolute chaos.
2. We saw ourselves in Lara Jean
Lara Jean was relatable then, and ironically, or unironically, we still relate to her now. Sigh.
She was awkward, emotional, a hopeless romantic and sometimes much more comfortable imagining a relationship than actually being in one. She overthought everything, lived inside her own head and had an entire universe of feelings that she wasn’t always brave enough to say out loud. There was something so comforting about watching a character who didn’t have everything figured out.
And maybe that’s why she still hits differently years later. We aren’t the same teenagers who watched her navigate high school and first love, but some parts of her feel familiar even now. The overthinking? Unfortunately, still there. The romanticising? Absolutely. The tendency to create an entire scenario in your head before anything has actually happened? Let’s not talk about it.
3. Peter Kavinsky. Enough said.
Peter Kavinsky was not just the internet’s boyfriend. He was our boyfriend. The audience’s boyfriend. The fake boyfriend who somehow became the standard against which every fictional man after him was going to be measured.
The little things were what got us. The notes. The gestures. The way he held Lara Jean’s hand or slipped his hand into her pocket. The fact that he could be ridiculously confident one second and then completely soft with her the next. Even when she was technically his fake girlfriend, this man was already setting standards.
And Noah Centineo’s portrayal had a lot to do with it. Peter had that perfect rom-com combination of charm, confidence, teasing and genuine sweetness that made us understand exactly why Lara Jean fell for him. We weren’t watching from the sidelines either. We were right there with her.
4. The fake dating trope we will never get tired of
We knew from the beginning how this was going to end. Fake dating? Please. We all know they’re going to fall in love.
But that is exactly why we love it.
There is something ridiculously satisfying about watching two people insist that their relationship is completely fake while slowly becoming the only two people in the room who don’t realise they’re catching feelings. We’ve seen it in The Proposal, we’ve seen it in Off Campus, and The People We Meet On Vacation, and we’ll probably keep watching it in every adaptation and rom-com that brings it back. Give us the fake relationship, the accidental feelings, the jealousy and the inevitable “wait, I actually love you” moment and we are seated.
5. The soundtrack was doing some of the flirting too
The To All The Boys soundtrack deserves its own little appreciation because some scenes simply wouldn’t hit the same without the music behind them.
And yes, we are still thinking about that bathtub scene with “Lovers” by Anna of the North playing in the background. Eight years later. Some scenes just become permanently attached to a song, and that is one of them. The soundtrack gave the movie that dreamy, slightly nostalgic feeling that made everything feel more romantic than it probably had any right to.
It wasn’t just songs playing in the background. They became part of the memories we associate with the movie.
6. The hopeless romantic in us
At its heart, To All The Boys understood the hopeless romantic in all of us. The girl who writes letters she’ll never send. The boy who leaves little notes. The dates. The kisses. The longing. The imaginary scenarios. The what if?
It let us believe that all those little romantic things we’d secretly built up in our heads weren’t completely ridiculous. And maybe that’s why we loved Lara Jean’s world so much. It was a little unrealistic, a little cheesy and unapologetically romantic — exactly what a good comfort rom-com is supposed to be.
And eight years later…
We love movies like To All The Boys because sometimes you don’t want a complicated story or a movie that’s going to change your life. Sometimes you just want something that makes you smile, gives you butterflies and reminds you why you fell in love with movies in the first place.
Eight years later, Lara Jean’s letters, Peter Kavinsky, that soundtrack and all those ridiculously cute moments still have us exactly where they left us.
Anyway, brb. Giving it a rewatch for the nth time tonight.