Khuda Aur Mohabbat Season 3 Is Sending Out Strong Parenting Messages That Can Make Or Break Our Children’s Chances At Success In Life!
“Tum Bare Kaam Ke Bete Ho. Zaroori Nahi Hai Keh Degree Haasil Karne Waala Beta Hi Baap Ka Naam Roshan Kare”
Khuda Aur Mohabbat
Did writer Hashim Nadeem just send out a parenting tip to desi parents? Do we rely so much on traditional choices as a measure of life successes? Does every child need a degree & a drive to ace those exams to meet parent (& society) expectations?
Farhad in KAM 3 initially came off as a lazy, good for nothing, cheating, fast track, short cut kinda guy.
Written off by his father as a good-for-nothing failure, forever compared to his elder brother who is fits the perfect mould in our social paradigms – did we also write off Farhad because of how his father saw (and treated) him?
But then, all of a sudden, Farhad switches gears, and just as we expected him to slip, fall, sleep in, pull a Farhad on his new employer (Javed Shaikh), he surprises us. Surprise, surprise, despite his (monumental) shortcomings, Farhad can be determined, hard working & committed?
“Waqai Tum Kaam Buhat Jald Seekh Gaye Ho” praises his employer, as Farhad responds: “Mujhe Koi Bhi Kaam Aasaan Lagta Hai Siwai Parhai Ke … Moti Moti Books Se Neend Aajaati Hai Mujhe. Abba Bhi Is Hi Liye naaraaz Rehte Hain Mujh Se“.
Farhad seems to be carving out a niche for himself. A small one albeit, but he is able to work in areas that come naturally to him (not books) and do a pretty good job – so much so, that the sense of pride reflects in his eyes.
This brings us to 2 very fine points, highlighted in KAM 3
- If you keep telling your child that he is no good, because he is not meeting societal benchmarks of what is branded as success
- If you keep comparing him to his siblings, you might actually harm his growth, and his self-confidence
Sometimes parents’ desires to see their children succeed in socially accepted spheres (education) is, unfortunately, a selfish desire to garner social praise for their own upbringing. What they might forget along the way, is that, every child is different. The musician might not take to Maths, the Sportsman cannot be restricted to a classroom, and the child who fails at exams might have a ‘street smartness’ about him that drives him to perform, and achieve in domains outside of the traditional classroom.
Are we as a society, willing to tweak our expectations for our children?
Can our schools and educational system cater to a youth that dreams of success, not failure, but is often relegated to the latter because he/she doesn’t fit into the boxes we have placed for them?
Your child’s future depends upon ‘how he sees you see him’ – therefore, if you encourage him, take time to explore his strengths, (rather than focusing on his weaknesses), you might just take the first step towards bringing up a happy, self confident, and yes, successful human being!
Khuda Aur Mohabbat Season 3 is sending out strong Parenting messages that can make or break our children’s chances at success in life! KAM 3, you got it right with Farhad, we hope every one’s listening!
