As #NotAllMen trended on Twitter, many women were outraged at the audacity some people had, at a crucial time like this, to shift the attention from the perpetrators and the lack of laws against domestic violence to more trivial issues such as differentiating between “evil men” and those we can “rely on”. Honestly, is this really the time to put the spotlight on men when every day a woman gets mercilessly butchered to death?
As a nation, we don’t shy away from speaking up for what we believe in but should some things just be left alone, unrefuted? Is everything even debatable? Shouldn’t there be some issues that we can all collectively agree on, instead of trying to one-up the other? I think it’s about time we understood that oppression isn’t a competition.
One of the things that is non negotiable is that all women deserve to feel safe and protected at home or at the workplace and must have the liberty to exercise their freedom of expression. In just a matter of one week three women suffered unjustly by the hands of men in our society. A woman named Bushra was killed by her husband who was a drug addict named Raza Ali and his daughter Saima had to stand against her own father to raise her voice for her mother. While Qurtulain, who was a mother of four children, was brutally murdered. Noor Mukadam, who was the daughter of the former ambassador to South Korea, was killed and then slaughtered by Zahir Jaffar.
Sadly, there is no end to this brutality and every day there is another Noor, Bushra or Qurtulain. In light of recent events women have expressed their tribulation on social media and shared their own experiences. There is an uproar demanding justice for these women and making our society a safer place for all.
However, the message was overshadowed and the real issue brushed under the rug as it soon fueled the ego and hurt the sentiments of Pakistani men.
Men in our society felt judged as many women believed them to be a part of the problem and thus, partially responsible for what’s happening. Naturally, they started feeling personally attacked. Ever since then, Twitter has been inundated with tweets debating this issue with each side sharing their side of the story.
All Men Are Protected By The Patriarchy
What Differentiates A “Good Man” From A “Bad” One & Would You Be Willing To Take The Risk To Find Out?
“Kyunke Aadmi Kharab Hain”
The Patriarchy Benefits No One.
Shifting The Focus Towards Petty Matters Once Again
So Accurate!
Be The Change
What Are You Doing To Help The Women Around You Feel Safe?
Granted we can’t generalize men under one label but as a woman, I wish everyone knew that we are crushed from the inside and feel hollow right now. We feel exposed and vulnerable, prone to any kind of abuse and violence. It’s not that we blame all the men for the evils of society but we wish that they understood that we simply can’t overlook the many times we’ve been stabbed.
Is it so hard to understand our emotions? Why not just sit down and talk to the women in your life and ask them how they feel? Maybe the sorrow and discomfort in their eyes might convey the message even before their words do.
