Living with a narcissist might transform your personality till you are unrecognizable – even to yourself! Asra’s character in Shiddat is all about the damaging effects of living with a narcissist, Sultan. She braves his sudden mood swings, constant criticism, lack of empathy, manipulation and blame-shifting – character traits of a person who needs help himself. However, and unfortunately, a narcissist often ends up damaging his or her partner’s mental health as well.
7th Sky Entertainment, driven by Abdullah Kadwani and Asad Qureshi, believes in leading from the front. Together, this duo has been able to carve a niche from the onset. 7th Sky Dramas represent a range of stories, from family-centric dilemmas, to Gen Z challenges. Shiddat is one such drama on the block that takes on the story of love, narcissism, and emotional wellbeing in relationships to essay the story of Asra and Sultan.
Asra is now depicting all the signs of someone who is experiencing abuse and continues to slip deeper into the web of contradictions, emotional and mental manipulation that Sultan is making her undergo. Unfortunately, Asra’s family, who should be able to save her from the ordeal, especially her mother and bhabi, are pushing her to save her marriage and focus on Sultan’s wants instead, a terribly warped mindset in our society to deal with problematic husbands who might be harboring deeper issues than mere “typical desi husband” syndrome.
Here’s why women like Asra need instant attention and how to spot some of the behavioural signs that cry out for help!
1. Low Self Esteem
Asra seems to think she needs to change her personal fashion and dressing choices and dress more like her neighbour Mashal. She has been exposed to a constant barrage of criticism on her personal wardrobe and style choices earlier in the relationship, and now, Sultan has set up Mashal as the ultimate example before Asra, of someone who knows how to look good, appreciating her constantly.
The planned, continuous criticism has done its damage as Asra has decided to change her appearance, not trusting her own style choices anymore. This from a girl who was once very fond of dressing up and was appreciated by others for her style sense.
2. Insecurity
Sultan has set up Alina and now Mashal as the kind of women he admires. This appreciation for women other than his partner coupled with his constant desire to be near them, dismissing Asra’s personality, intelligence and abilities; from cooking to interior designing, has made her deeply insecure about her relationship and any interaction he has with other women, especially Mashal, at this moment, as she is the one most apparent to her. Sultan could have exploited this with any other woman too, but here, he chooses Mashal as he wants to isolate Asra from a fast growing friendship because, well, he cannot tolerate her attention diverting even for a moment, from himself.
3. Isolation
Asra is becoming progressively isolated from all those who care about her. Initially, from her family, whose advice she would dismiss in the face of Sultan’s demands, and now Mashal, the only person she might confide in. Asra will very soon antagonize Mashal and walk away from a friend who was giving her a somewhat objective view of her relationship as well as keeping her attention away from Sultan’s constant negativity. Sultan would behave in the same manner previously if Asra spent too much time with his sister Hala or his mother. Hence, ensuring that she doesn’t get too close to anyone other than himself.
4. Defensive
Asra becomes defensive when a family member or friend tries to advise her on giving time and priority to herself. Whereas she had started listening to Mashal a bit, Sultan noticed the difference and struck back with mental manipulation so much so that Asra is now totally under his spell. Any suggestion that Sultan might be overbearing or too demanding is disregarded by Asra, who claims that he is the centre of her life now. And she will do exactly as he pleases.
The transformation inside her began much earlier when Sultan would mention how he preferred dull colours on her, and how she can do what she pleases but if she loves him and cares for him, she will abide. The emotional blackmailing was subtle and did the damage as Asra gradually slid into a totally compliant role as his wife.
5. Unable To Take A Stand For Herself
Asra now seems to believe the hurtful things Sultan has been hurling at her from the onset of their relationship. From her intellectual inability (unable to play chess), to her lack of dressing or fashion sense, or appearing less desirable than other girls. Asra used to defend herself to some extent earlier in the relationship, mentioning her achievements and personal choices as clear wins. Now she is a former shadow of herself, following Sultan’s recipe of how to dress, behave, who to befriend and even how to think, her mother and sister (unknowingly), have also contributed to this systematic breakdown of her personality.
In summary, Asra needs to run and escape the mental torment and emotional torture that Sultan has been putting her through. She needs someone who will understand her state of mind, especially since she is about to isolate her one and only friend, Mashal.
Will Hala be that person? Let’s hope so!
Are you watching Shiddat? Tell us if you are hoping for Asra’s character to be saved as well!
Shiddat is written by Zanjabeel Asim Shah, produced under 7th Sky Entertainment. It is produced by Abdullah Kadwani & Asad Qureshi and directed by Zeeshan Ahmed. The cast includes Muneeb Butt, Anmol Baloch, Noor ul Hassan, Erum Akhtar, Minsa Malik, Hiba Ali Khan, Shamyl Khan, Ismat Zaidi, Namra Shahid, Fajjer Khan, Zain Afzal, Sami Khan child actor, Sohail Masood and others.
